Having a car is convenient. Having a car is supremely perfect. Unfortunately, everything demands the special service, and the most expensive automobiles should be “treated” even more carefully.
Though it is supposed that the cars of the luxury segment are of high quality, they sometimes turn to be the real catastrophes. The Fords, being ones of the most popular vehicles, have the same lacks, what unleash an ironical reaction (as we can only laugh when it is getting worse) and dare a lot of lulz and jokes. Here are some of Ford ones.
Yep, there are the cases when you should make efforts to make your car work, but Fords are among the most troublesome things the car owners ever had! What can they do? Just push it and joke at the situation.
Why do they fit heated tailgates to luxury Ford trucks? To keep your hands warm when you pushed them.
What is the difference between a Ford and a shopping trolley? A shopping trolley is much easier to push.
What’s better, a Ford or a Chevy? Who cares. Will it get me to Walmart?
The Ford Explorer, Otherwise known as the Ford Exploder!
What did Lincoln say about his experience at Ford theater? He said it was mind blowing.
FORD – Failure On Research & Development
Q: What is the difference between a Ford and a tampon? A: A tampon comes with it’s own tow rope.
Why does Ford put magazines in the glove box of their new vehicles? So you’ll have something to read while waiting on the tow truck.
When there is no time and energy to crack long jokes (as you have push pushed your car to the top of the hill), but there is the highly sarcastic mood – just call to mind these abbreviation definitions.
FORD – Factory Ordered Road Disaster
FORD – Fixed Or Repaired Daily!
FORD – Found On Rubbish Dump
What does FORD stand for? Fords Only Run Downhill
Ford Owner Really Dumb
FORD – Fix Or Recycle Dilemma
Four Old Rusted Doors
If you are afraid of the fury of the Ford owners after your direct disses, play with words! Until the moment they realize that you tease them, you will be able to run far away.
What do you call a Norwegian prostitute? A Fjord Escort.
What was the first car Henry Fordasaurus invented? A Model T-Rex.
How can they improve a Ford Focus? Put a Toyota engine in it.
The Ford Ranger, Otherwise known as the Ford Danger!
What’s the difference between a golf ball and a Ford? You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.
FORD Freaking Old Rusted Datsin
Q: Why are FORD dealers giving away a dog with each FORD sold? A: So the owner has a companion to walk home with.
Why are the new Fords lighter? So a Chevy can tow more of them at once.
The wave of Ford anti-fans becomes bigger and bigger every year. We should notice that this wave has pretty cool sarcastic jokes in the archives! It is so cool to tease the Ford owners when you have a car of another brand, but be careful! The Ford fans have the perfect sense of humor. Otherwise, they did not buy the Fords.
What’s the difference between a ford and a Mormon? You can shut the door on a Mormon!
What do you call a Ford with 200,000 miles on it? A lie.
Who has the best Ford joke? Ford does. Have you seen their lineup?
What is the aim of a Ford concept car? An attempt to keep their car running.
What is the Ford owner’s most ardent wish? To buy a car.
How do you make a Ford go faster downhill? Turn off the engine.
Ford is just another four letter word!
Ford-Flipped Over Rebuilt Dodge
There is no life without a battle – and this is between Dodge and Ford. These companies are too different to be compared, though people can turn into reality everything! In form of jokes, but still. These are the two huge companies that are constantly comparing their products. Their fans do the same, however, Fords get much more attention and puns like these.
The people who say they would rather push a Ford than drive a Holden usually do.
FORD – Funky Old Rebuilt Dodge
Why are the latest Fords so aerodynamically designed? It improves the Chevy tow truck’s fuel consumption.
What did the Ford say to the Chevy? Would you like a tow home?
F.cked Over Rebuilt Dodge
Q: What do you call someone who buys a second hand ford? A: Scrap Dealer!
I went to a couple of car dealerships last week. The first I stopped at was Kia. Nothing really caught my eye, but the price was right. Then I went to a Ford dealer. I didn’t really find anything I liked, but every car had a pair of shoes in the trunk. Finally, I went to the Chevy dealer where I saw one that I liked. The dealer did the once over with me, then he popped the trunk. Disappointed, I looked at the dealer and said, “There’s something missing.”
The dealer was puzzled and asked, “What?” I said, “At the Ford dealership I checked out, they had a new pair of shoes in the trunk of every car!” Smiling the dealer said, “That’s so they can walk home!”
The Ford company has pretty much of experience: it was founded long ago. So long ago that someone supposes the Pithecanthropus could drive it – and the Fords haven’t changed since that time and will never change in future.
What kind of car did Fred Flinstone drive? A ford of course, and it ain’t much different now!
What is the aim of a Ford project car? An attempt to keep their car running.
Ford, well at least they circled the problem.
What did the Toyota say to the Ford on the side of the road? Rust-in-peace.
Have You Out Driven a Ford Lately?
I tried to download Ford Racing 2 today… It crashed.
Found on Road Dead
Q: Why does the BA XR8 Ute have cup and thermos holders built into the tailgate? A: So when you push the ute you can have a drink at the same time.
One can say that there exists the game – a person gives an abbreviation, and the others try to make as many funny meanings of it, as they can. To play with the FORD acronym is totally kicking off!
FORD – Flintstone Or Rubble Driven
FORD – Forward Only, Reverse Defective
Ford Acronym – Flip Over Read Directions
For Only Retarded Drivers
Foot On Road Decelerates
Found On Railroad Deserted
Found On Russian Dump
Ford Owners Recommend Daywoo
The funny sayings can be really stunning. Check out these ones – we suppose that they can be included in the Ford jests top list.
Why do the new FORD Explorers have larger bumpers? To make it easier on the towel trucks.
This is Holden country and on quiet nights you can hear Fords rusting.
Did you know Jesus had a Ford That’s why he walked everywhere
You know on a real quiet night you can hear a Ford rusting?
If Ford had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.
Why is this country so far in debt? Because the president drives a Ford.
The Ford Escort. Otherwise known as The Ford Escort Me To A Chevy Dealer!
The line of pickups is also the subject of the jokes. Well, if laughing at the company, remember all the cars it makes! Especially the most popular ones. There are the rumors that the Fords brake so frequently that there should be always a track behind them. We hope, it is not true, although the jokes try to prove the opposite.
What do the new speed limit signs say on our suburban roads? Max speed – 60 km/h – Fords do best you can.
What goes on pages 4-5 of the Ford’s user’s manual? The train & bus schedule.
Buy a Ford and you buy the ‘best’. Drive a mile and walk the rest.
Why do they fit ABS braking systems to the latest Fords? So the driver can stop quicker to pick up the fallen off parts.
I can dodge a Ford, but can’t afford a Dodge…
You wanna man that drives a Lexus, but your dad drives a Ford. Why you can’t be humble like your mom?
Q: What did the HOLDEN say to the Ford? A: Better start running.
A man and his dog went out riding one day in a Ford car. When they got out in the country the car broke down and the man, knowing no other way to get his car to town, hitched his dog to the car and then started back. When he arrived in town an officer of the humane society immediately put him under arrest for cruelty to animals. When he was arraigned before court for trial the judge asked the officer what he arrested this man for. The officer stepped up and said, “This man was arrested for tying tin cans to a dog’s tail.”
Those, who say proudly that they hate Fords are definitely brave and bold persons. There are so many adorers of these cars that the pride and honor would melt away when escaping from an infuriated Ford-lovers’ crowd.
Driving a ford is like the special Olympics…. even if you win you’re still a retard
Friends don’t let friends drive Fords.
Ford … Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
What do you call a Ford with a seat belt? A rucksack.
WHAT SHOULD A FORD THUNDERBIRD REALLY BE CALLED? A ford thunderturd
I left my Adderall in my Ford Fiesta, It is now a Ford Focus. I can’t claim credit for this one, I heard it on one of my favorite streamers’ streams.
Here is a car , you have not been looking for, that leaks oil and a whole lot more, I hope you haven’t driven a ford lately.
The Ford owners usually joke at their cars by themselves, but save you the God if you think that you can laugh out loud at their beloved vehicles in their presence! Just keep in mind these disses and enjoy the silent ridicules.
Why do they put sidewalks beside most streets and highways? So Ford owners have a safe place to walk home.
What do you call a Ford at the top of a Hill? A Miracle.
How do you double the value of a Ford Icon? Full the tank with petrol.
Q: Why did Ford start putting magnetic bumpers on the back of Ford pick-ups? A: So it would catch all the parts that fell off the guys Ford pick-up.
Why are Ford dealers giving away a dog with each Ford sold? So the owner has a someone to walk home with.
What do you call two Fords at the top of a hill? A mirage.
HOW CAN THEY APPROVE THE NEW FORD TRUCK OR CAR? Put a Chevy engine in it.
Some creative minds could hit upon the idea to define the abbreviations the way they see. To be honest, it is really funny and inspires to think over the meanings of the acronyms we meet in ordinary life.
FORD – Formed Of Rejected DNA
FORD – Fast Only Rolling Downhill
FORD – Final Organ of Reproductive Discipline
FORD – Fails On Rainy Days
FORD – Fatally Obese Redneck Driver
Frequent Opinion: Really Disappointed
FORD -Found Outside Rotting Dump
FORD -For Old, Rotten Deadbeat
FORD -Forwarded Once; Return Denied
Making fun of Ford speed capabilities is always cheering up the process. Just imagine, how many jokes you will be able to say when driving your snail car!
Why does Ford make tractors and Opel not? Because Opel can’t get anything to run that slow.
What’s the difference between a golf ball and a Ford? A golf ball can be driven 300 yards.
How long does it take for a ford falcon to drive from Sydney to Melbourne? Depends on how fast the car carrier takes to get there!
How long can a ford go for without repairs? Depends if you can leave the ford dealer.
Ford claims that 90% of its cars are still on the road today. That’s pretty bad, apparently only 10% of them made it back home.
Today 99% of Fords are on the road the other 1% made it to the car shop.
Q: What does the GT stand for on a Ford? A: Glued together!
What do you call a Ford Convertible? A mini-skip.
Ford Mustang is a cult car in some degree, however, the jokes about this Ford company product became the classic also. We can joke at Mustangs forever, just like this auto will probably exist.
Mustang – pissing off the neighborhood since 1964
What should the Ford Mustang really be called? The Ford Rustang.
WHAT SHOULD THE FORD MUSTANG REALLY BE CALLED? The Ford Muststink
Why does a ford and a tin can have in common? They both rust just as far.
I could never keep a Ford under me, I was always under the Ford.
What would Chrysler’s version of the Ford Focus be called? Chrysler Concentrate.
Why do people name their kids Mercedes, Lexus, Porsche when they look like buicks & fords?
God make [Naughty Pottyword], Ford gave it wheels
Only when we compare things, we can appraise them. We laughed out loud when saw these ford haters’ sayings. Feel the difference!
What is the difference between a Ford and a porcupine? Porcupines have pricks on the outside.
What’s the difference between a Ford and the principal’s office? It’s less embarrassing if your friends see you leaving the principal’s office.
What’s the difference between a Ford and a Jehovah’s Witness? You can shut the door on a Jehovah’s Witness.
Why Pokemon Go a lifesaver? Because it gives Ford owners something to do while they walk home.
This is your brain “CHEVY”, this is your brain on drugs “FORD”
My friend and I decided to race our Ford Pintos. Mine broke down three miles down the road. I had to walk the rest of the way. I won.
I’d rather push a BMW than drive a Ford.
SPEED KILLS Drive a Ford and live forever.
Well, the dirty disses can really touch the dirt. It is not a joke – the Fords cannot be sexy or arousal at all, as the anti-fans believe; but dirty – of course. Especially after a usual brake and shameful calling for the trucks.
That’s not a leak… My Ford’s just marking its territory!
What’s worse than a missing toilet bowl? Driving a Ford.
Buy a Ford and you buy the best. Drive the first mile and walk the rest.
Why do the new Ford Explorers have larger bumpers? To make it easier on the tow trucks.
Why does the new Ford Escape parallel park itself? Because white trash can only trailer park!
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. If it wasn’t for our Fords, our tools would rust.
My father works as a statistician at Ford. He must be pretty well-respected there, people are always asking for his autograph.
Ford, Ford, best in town, drive it once, your engines down
It is a real surprise for us, why did the jokers choose an unhappy chicken to be the part of these puns, though we should say it perfectly highlights the dullness of the situations depicted.
Why didn’t the chicken cross the road? Because his F150 got stuck.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To push he’s FORD F150 back into the dealer’s show room.
I wanna buy me a Ford truck and push it up and down the road.
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford? It said Focus.
What’s the difference between a Ford owner and a carp? One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.
Q: What was the first car Henry Fordasaurus invented? A: A Model T-Rex.
FORD Backwards… Driver Returns On Foot
I tried to start up a business as a Ford dealership I lost my focus
The car crashes can blow everyone’s mind, but the Ford owners certainly know that they can get a heart attack and get mad every second they drive their auto. At least, we think they can get.
Actually, we can make the two meanings of the word “gay” – but we decided to kill the two birds with one stone and picked both, mixing the pansy boys-drivers of the Fords and just lolable pics.
What can be better than the images with the minimalistic Ford sign and some ironic quotes? We suppose – nothing, so share it with you with pleasure.
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